Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Crouch, Hold, Engage!

Gavin Henson, the pretty boy of international rugby,

has been suspended for 10 weeks for throwing an elbow.

In rugby.

I thought you had to kill a guy to get that kind of suspension.

I bring this up because it shows how rugby is different then other sports. What Gavin Henson was really suspended for was being a Prima Donna (Sorry, Andy). It's just not something you do in rugby. You don't prance around in the end zone. You don't mouth "hi mom" to the cameras. You don't hog the goddamn ball.

Maybe because rugby was always the sport of the middle class in England, showing off is still discouraged. Gavin, with his overdone hair and pop-star girlfriend, needed a swift kick in the ass. Usually, it happens on the pitch. But with all that grease in his hair, I imagine he must be a slippery fucker.

In American football, act like a cunt and you get on television. In rugby, act like a cunt, and, well, you get...

When I was in England for the Bingham Cup, I had a discussion with the secretary of the English Rugby Football Union. The main concern they have is keeping the democratic spirit of the sport in the age of overpaid superstars. Good luck.

Besides, Gavin Henson is a back. We all know that the real rugby hotties are the prop forwards!


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